My Life as a Stage Mom

by C Jill Reed

My Life as a Stage Mom

It had been a year since my maternity leave, but I wasn't quite ready to go full-force back into my career. I had been working as a Clinical Dietitian, yet my new role in life had no place for the hospital. I was now full-time mom; and though my passion for health kept me going forward - reading up on peer-reviewed health and medical journals, texts and health-related trends - I felt wonderfully attached to raising my twin daughters.

As luck would have it, I could have an opportunity to bring in money for my girls without having to leave my kids to a nanny or part-time sitter. Though reluctant and skeptical at first, I suddenly fell into the realm of "stage mom".

A stage mom of a baby/toddler has to keep on top of profile information and update pictures of her child(ren) quite often as they grow and change so quickly. Sometimes it entails updating a number of casting website profiles with pictures and statistical information (ht, wt, hair and eye color, clothing size, etc..). And, they may even charge every time a profile picture is updated. Photoshoots are not cheap and may have to be done every six months or sooner.

Once on set, a child over 6 months and under the age of 2 can work a total of 4.5 hours. So having a twin is a definite plus since they can change the baby out when the time-allotment has expired. This buys more time for filming scenes. So technically speaking one can be on set as long as 9 hours and that is not counting the drive time. Days can be long and tiresome. The older a child gets, the longer he/she can work. So if 9 hours wasn't enough, there's more long days to come. Not that I am complaining. In fact, hanging out in trailers waiting with other kids and their moms is a great way to bond. And it is great getting to know the actors. It's nice to be able to run into someone you've been on set with and have a real conversation, rather than just wish you could be part of their world. (Actors are just regular people who happen to have a job that that can raise them into celebrity status). Other perks: Food is plentiful. Meals are scheduled in and there's always craft service (for snacks, drinks and latte's and and other pick-me-ups). Not to mention: my babies got paid. Not too bad to start of a college fund at 6 months old.

So how did we end up in 'the biz'? I had been shopping with my twins at Target, when another twin mom approached me and suggested I get my girls into a modeling/TV agency. She had already signed her girls with a reputable agency and Paid-it-Forward to me. From that moment on, my life would forever be changed (well at least for a good year).

It all began when my girls were 6 months old. Shortly after signing on with the agency, they got their first gig - modeling in baby carriers for Infantino. Though only one baby was to be partially seen in the side sling carrier, the other - who modeled the Bjorn - managed to get a profile shot in the final take (it was intended only to see the back of her tiny head). Ok, so they weren't stealing the show, but at least they got a foot - or should I say head - in the door.

   Little did I know that a few months later they would be taking over a role as a series regular on Days of our Lives: my Ailish and Julia portrayed "Sami's baby" Grace Rafaela Brady in a tear-jerking storyline. It was surreal to hand my baby to Alison Sweeney, someone I grew up watching on the daytime SOAP. It was there that I met my dear friend Laura whose adorable girls played the other infant in the baby-switch, Sidney Dimera.

We'd completed 5 episodes of a failed TV show, In the Motherhood, playing Cheryl Hines' baby Sophie, prior. And now we were thrust into the world of SOAPS - and getting paid well for that. As it turns out, the daytime dramas are a different union than episodic television and thus the pay rate is much higher with a commission paid to the agent on top of the rate.

Sadly character Grace would die after we filmed 17 episodes (we knew that going in), and my girls would have to move on. But what fun we had with the Sinnema family (Lauren and Haley as Sydney Dimera) between takes. It was an impromptu play date when the girls were on set together.

Out of work, I thought I'd go crazy. We'd had such a good run, with little break between. Gig after gig and less than a year old. A Target shoot was in the near future, but the powers that be decided they'd "rather go with the boys". A set of boys who I'd later realize had been my friend Kristen's sons, also doing very well in the TV world, filming Cougar town's baby Stan and BIG LOVE's baby Joey (not to mention their numerous print ads for Crazy 8).

I patiently waited for the next opportunity and it finally arrived - after an agonizing 2 weeks awaiting a final decision, BIG LOVE choose my girls to play Ginnifer Goodwin's (Margene's) baby Nell. It was there that I realized my bloated ego would collapse. Not that the other mom's weren't sweet. They were wonderful and like family. It was that the other kids had done so much more and only 2 years older (including movies and commercials).

I'd let go of my "green envy coat" and enjoy the ride while it lasted - for the whole Season 4. But the girls wouldn't move onto BIG LOVE's next season like the rest of the kid cast who'd began as infants and were now taking on speaking roles. And, instead of being "aged" - a term for replacing a baby for an older infant - their role was given to a set of 9-month-old twins (even though Ailish and Julia were briefly seen walking in the last episode and a petite 18 months when the season ended).

So as I write, their resume - though not too bad - has not grown and my girls are home with me leading normal lives. ( http://www.oconnortwins.net/  ) A potential to work on another SOAP arrived, but my girls didn't even pass "the door test" at their interview. Yes, 2 years old and already so independent thinking and suddenly shy, they would not walk alone with the interviewer to her office. But they were not alone; apparently a couple other sets (of twins) shyed away as well. Thus we got the clichéd "Thank you, you can go" with a smile and that was it.

Of course I am hopeful for future gigs, but I stay focused on my role as mom and my passion for Dietetics. Since our hiatus from show biz, I've given myself the opportunity to write and have been contributing as a nutrition expert / source to various online publications. This time off has given me a burst of confidence in my area of expertise and a platform from which to grow on. Stage mom is welcome when the time arrives, but for now I'll enjoy my career and my life at home with my babies.

-D. Lauren O'Connor, MS, RD is a mother, Registered Dietitian, writer and nutrition blogger (http://nutrisavvysblog.wordpress.com ) residing with her husband and twin girls in Los Angeles, California. Her babies' - Ailish and Julia O'Connor's - resume and screencaps from their past TV shows can be seen at www.oconnortwins.net and they each have their own imdb page.

Written by Lauren O'Connor, MS, RD

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